Feeling Stuck On Your Mental To-Do List? 3 Brain Hacks To Get You Going

A client was describing her frustration that she couldn’t seem to get things on her to-do list done. The desire was there, but there was a disconnect between that and the action needed to complete the tasks. I call these "back burner" stressors. They simmer in the background, increasing the temperature of your stress in a quiet, slow-burn. This back burner stress could be creeping into your sleep, edging its way into your relationships, decreasing your tolerance, and increasing frustration without you even being cognizant of it.

Several things could be contributing to the disconnect between desire and action, including:

Fear of failure
Feeling overwhelmed and not knowing where to start
Setting a goal that is too big or too small
Lack of faith in yourself
Negative self-talk or low self-worth
Lack of the WHY behind the task at hand

Here are 3 brain hacks to consider when you are faced with the above dilemma.

1 | Become an expert in your thinking and identify and replace low energy thoughts with high energy thoughts

Too often we allow our thoughts to become passengers on a runaway train bound for chaos and anxiety. Rarely are we actually in touch with what we are thinking and communicating to ourselves and how it may be affecting our energy. By increasing awareness and listening to what we are thinking (after all, our thoughts create our reality), we have an opportunity to shift our thinking to something that may serve us better.

For example, not paying attention to our thoughts may look like this:

Boxes need to be recycled:

“I really should get up and move the boxes out to the recycling. Gosh, that sounds so exhausting. It's not that big of a deal if they stay there, but then I know my husband will become irritated with me since I said I would do it. I find it so annoying how irritated he gets because of the recycling. Why can't he just be more laid-back? Maybe we aren't a good fit, and I should consider getting a divorce. Then my family would really judge me. I'm so tired of my family judging me about every life decision I make. Why can't I just live freely? Yeah, I am not getting up to take those boxes out right now. I'll do it later.” A state of panic ensues, and fight, flight or fright hormones are released. All of a sudden, staying on the couch is either what you deserve, what your husband deserves, or just all you have the energy to do.

Low energy thoughts are thoughts that essentially take the wind out of our sails. They are thoughts that create realities in our heads that are anxiety producing. They are often stories and narratives that we have created that likely aren’t real, but our subconscious brains don’t know the difference, so we end up acting “as if” the narrative is factual. These low energy thoughts may have served more of a purpose earlier in our evolution. We had to be cautious and keep ourselves in situations that were safe and predictable or we could have gotten attacked by a predator. Looking for danger served a very clear purpose back then, but now it mostly just keeps us stuck. These low energy thoughts tend to short-circuit our brains because there is pressure ("I should") and performance-related communication that makes us anxious.

Low energy thoughts might sound like this:

I should do that thing I’ve been meaning to do.
I don’t feel like doing that right now. I’ll do it later.
I don’t want to deal with it.
I have to do that thing and ugh…
It’s too risky.
I dread having to do this.
What if it ends in disaster?
Why do I have to do this?
This is so unfair.
I’m such a lazy ass.

Now let's take the same situation above and look at it from a place of high energy thoughts.

Boxes need to be recycled:

“I get to feel some energy right now that will propel me off this couch and allow me to get these boxes outside to be recycled. Once I get them out, it will feel great to be done with that task, and I can just envision the smile on my husband's face that he doesn’t have to be the one to do it. I get to get up and check this off my to-do list, and I can’t wait for that clean feeling I get with a little organization.”

High energy thoughts propel us into action. They provide forward, positive momentum where we see what we need to do as a “get to” or an opportunity versus a "should" or a "have to." This is a highly important brain hack that can completely change our perception of an upcoming or current situation.

I get to finish this or do this. (versus should)
I’m going to be happy when I _____.
I can’t wait to feel the satisfaction from_____.
I am focused and organized today.
What if this brings me a great feeling when I’m done that allows me to do other things?
I have an opportunity to do this thing.
I look forward to finishing this task.
I’m so lucky I have the chance to____.

Once you become an expert in your thinking process, you then can choose to change your reality to one of energy, focus, and accomplishment.

2 | Write out the script for how you want something to go as well as daily intentions

Writing is a powerful tool and can help us reframe a situation completely. If we think about it, talk about it, then write about it, it will have a completely different outcome in our minds (and reality) than if we just think about it.

I am a big supporter of the benefits of morning journaling. Having an opportunity to write out your intentions for the day gives the brain something to move toward, and you can check in with your thinking throughout the day and ask yourself, “Is this thought in line with my intention or goal for the day?” It is a great guidepost. The first 30 minutes of your day are an important indicator of how productive you’ll be, so get up and write!

Furthermore, we are often able to say what we don’t want, and less frequently do we focus on what we do want. Writing out a script for how you want the day to go, what you want to get accomplished, and how you want it to get done increases your chances that it will go that way tenfold. Creating those neural pathways in the brain through scripting clears the initial path in the brain and makes the actual event that much easier to accomplish because you’ve already been there.

It might look like this:

“I will get up a few minutes earlier than normal today and spend the first 10 minutes meditating and journaling. I will set my intention on focus and organization, and this will help me get the things I need to get accomplished done. I know that I need to get those boxes out to the recycling, and I will happily do that after I eat breakfast. It will feel amazing to get that task done, and the relief I feel afterward will make me feel like I can breathe a little better. It will feel great! After I get them out, I will allow myself to sit down and scroll through social media.”

Whether you have to write a paper, pay bills, clean out a closet, go through your clothes, or contact a family member, scripting out how you want it to go will dramatically increase the chances you will get it done. Try it :)

3 | Get in touch with the WHY behind what you need to do or what makes you want productive energy

We humans would rather think there was a purpose to our lives and our actions than have a purposeless existence. Again, the origin of this drive comes from needing to perform and contribute so as not to get ousted from the group, thereby decreasing our chance for survival dramatically. So the WHY of I should get out there and do something like hunt is because I want to survive and stay in my group. The WHY is helpful to assess the importance of doing the things you need to do. If it has a clearer purpose in your brain, it will give you some push and drive you may not have had otherwise.

Here is how it might look:

Paying bills on time.

Why is this important to me? I know that my parents struggled with bills because they were financially insecure. It was a huge stressor and caused tension between them. Paying my bills on time is important to me because it reminds me that I am financially secure and safe. It’s also important to me to pay the bills on time so that it stays out of my marriage as a stressor.

Or:

Paying bills on time is important to me because I am striving to become a more organized and focused person. That’s mine. ;)

A triple brain hack here is sit down, write out the why, script the story in your head using high energy thoughts, and visualize yourself completing the task. Let me know how it goes!