Relationships don’t exist in a vacuum. Our actions are influenced by their context.

Since health and safety concerns have escalated during the novel coronavirus pandemic, businesses, schools, community gatherings, etc. have been forced to shut down. As a result, individuals, couples, and families have been forced to re-structure their lives and adapt to an entirely different routine almost overnight. Because of this, many people have become stressed and strained, having to redefine the way they live, work, and relate to one another.

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The answer? Empathetic disappointment versus critical disappointment.

I worked with a couple who had recently returned from a family vacation up North. This couple, along with their two children set off for an adventure to New York City. The husband, who is mostly busy working, was looking forward to a week away. The wife, who home schools the children was also looking for a nice change of pace and scenery. There were some good times and some less good times on the trip, and one argument which culminated after the family was moving slowly to get to a sightseeing event that the wife had planned and no one else seemed enthusiastic about. Upon their return, their different experiences of the same trip began to emerge. The husband overheard the wife describing New York negatively to a friend, and the wife learned after the fact about the resentment her husband felt about having to come home early for a sporting event for one of the kids. It is the reactions from one to the other about their different perceptions of the trip that is being focused on here, not the differences themselves.

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I recently read an article entitled: “What does it mean to hold space for someone else” by Heather Plett.

I believe this is the key to good, open, honest communication. It’s an important article to read. You can read the article here: http://upliftconnect.com/hold-space/

So what does it mean to hold space for someone else?
“It means that we are willing to walk alongside another person in whatever journey they’re on without judging them, making them feel inadequate, trying to fix them, or trying to impact the outcome. When we hold space for other people, we open our hearts, offer unconditional support, and let go of judgment and control”

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